8 ways to be kind


8 Ways to Be Kind to Yourself

There’s no reason to steal your own sunshine.

By Laci Mosier

We’re taught to be kind to others from the very beginning, but all too often we leave ourselves off the list. Without even realizing it, we can be our biggest bully and greatest adversary. But life’s tough enough—there’s no reason to steal your own sunshine.

Here are eight ways to be a kinder, more loving friend to yourself:

1. Be in your corner.

Instead of submitting to your misgivings, stand up to them. Squash self-doubt. Cheer for yourself. You are your own biggest motivator, the true mover and shaker of your life. No one cares about you as much as you should care about yourself. So stand tall in your corner, and honor all that you are and all that you can become.

2. Pay it forward, to yourself.

Do things your future self will thank you for. Like wearing sunscreen. And starting savings accounts. And going to bed early—and actually taking vitamins. Send good karma into the universe. Do kind things now for the future you and future life you want to have. It’s never too late to start.

3. Give your flaws a high-five.

Your body is a powerful vessel capable of doing good and lovely things. Don’t be so hard on it. In an interview following the Boston Marathon bombing, one of the runners described how much she used to loathe her thighs—ashamed of their spider veins and collage of dimples. In the article’s photo she stood tall with her new prosthetic legs. “Now, I would give anything to have those legs I used to hate,” she said. Love your body, stretch marks, scars, and all.

4. Welcome the good.

Studies show that we subconsciously self-sabotage what we don’t think we deserve. If you don’t think you are worthy of love, happiness, or success, you won’t receive those things because you won’t allow yourself to let them in. So change your perception of what you think you deserve. Send out good vibes, and welcome them in with a warm heart when they come back to you.

5. Give yourself a hand.

Kindness is helping others when they are down, so help yourself just the same. If you’re down for the count or stuck in a rut, that’s okay—it happens. Accept it and then make a conscious effort to shift your perspective and pull yourself up. We’ve all been there, and you’d do the same for a friend.

6. Be whatever you are, wherever you are.

Yearning for the good old days or stressing about what the future holds dilutes the present. No matter where you are or what the situation is, feel it and embrace it. Don’t waste what you have now by wishing for what once was or longing for what could be. This is your time. Live in it.

7. Ditch the hard feelings.

Grudges are an ugly burden. And when you mess up, you can hold one against yourself. But the thing is, mistakes are a part of this wonderful life—and that’s okay. Don’t punish yourself by dragging past failures and mistakes around like a backpack full of rocks. They slow you down physically and emotionally. Learn from them, make peace with them, and set yourself free.

8. Be kind to others.

Many of us already know that volunteering has magnificent powers. When you help others, the work you’re doing, time you’re spending, or money you’re giving comes back around tenfold. Use your passion or craft to deepen the impact of your service. Teach a free yoga class for children, prepare your best dessert for a bake sale, or simply listen to the stories of others. Do good and be kind. It will pay invaluable dividends to the soul.

Photo via iStock

Laci Mosier is a copywriter living and loving in Austin, Texas. She and her one-eyed pirate dog live for exploring and discovering life’s magic. She is most inspired by yoga, running, Kundalini meditation, good books, great jams and even better coffee. Getting lost is where she is most often found. Follow her on the Twittersphere or Instagram.

 

 

 

10 Easy Ways to be Kind To Others

They say kindness doesn't cost a thing for a reason. As we grow to be role models, it's important that we teach others all the ways to be kind to others. As a mother, I teach my children through my actions as well as direct conversation.

With World Kindness Day approaching, as well as a year full of little self-care and high emotions, we need kindness more than ever before. We need to be kind to ourselves, to our loved ones, but especially to strangers.

Why is it important to be kind?

You may be wondering: What are the benefits of kindness and why should we be kind to others?

If you aren't intuitive or empathetic, you may not understand the impact you have on others. It may be unclear how your words and actions affect the recipient. These are things that are important for everyone to understand.

Kindness may or may not come naturally to you. That's okay – if you're reading this article it's because you want to learn how to be kind and that is admirable.

Kindness is important because:

  • It can make someone feel confident.
  • You can make new friends.
  • Kindness can make someone's day.
  • You can make someone feel like they are accepted.
  • Your kindness may be the one happy part of someone's day.
  • Being kind makes you feel good.
  • Practicing kindness regularly can improve mental health for those who give kindness and receive it.

How To Be Kind

I think kindness is often associated with spending money or doing something extraordinary. I am here to tell you that to be kind – is much deeper than that. In fact, I fully believe that true kindness impacts others more when you're doing simple or small acts of kindness.

What Are The Best Ways to Be Kind To Others?

In an effort to encourage goodness in these unpredictable times, I want to share a few easy ways to spread kindness. While these ideas are for you to give joy to others, I also recommend using some to be kind to yourself.

1. Listen and show interest.

By simply listening to someone and showing interest in the conversation, you can truly change someone's life. At the very least, you will show them that what they have to say matters.

Allow them to speak fully, without interrupting, and give cues that you're listening.

2. Show Compassion.

Likewise, showing compassion is a great act of kindness. You can do this by communicating how you understand and care for the recipient. Be vocal about your feelings toward the subject, giving an emotional response to what they are telling you.

By doing so, you're also validating their feelings which is an act of kindness greater than any.

3. Give genuine compliments.

One of my favorite ways to spread kindness is by giving compliments. I can't tell you how greatly my day improves when someone gives me a simple compliment. In fact, I tend to remember compliments that were given to my years ago.

If you are truly interested in being kind to others, give a genuine compliment.

4. Offer help.

Another easy way to be kind, is to offer your help. By handling a difficult task or giving advice on a serious subject, you're easing the burden of a another. By being a little creative with your thinking, you'll discover all sorts of ways you can help one another.

5. Say thank you.

A single “thank you” can go a very long way and unfortunately, many people don't hear it often. You can return a kindness by just saying thank you. This is especially important when encountering people who are doing a service for you: nail techs, your waitress, soldiers, etc.

6. Consider others' feelings when making decisions.

I tell you this and I tell you it very lightly because it's situational. To consider another's feelings when making decisions is a very good deed. I am by no means recommending that you put the needs or desires of another before you own. However, it's nice to be considered when decisions are made.

For example, if you're planning a family vacation – plan something specifically for the others who are attending.

7. Give a handmade gift.

The most special gifts tend to be handmade ones. It's the simple thought that someone took the time out of their day to make something just for you that's so special. Consider making handmade gifts rather than buying something. This will make a world of a difference – especially around the holidays.

8. Just smile.

This may sounds like a task that is so simple, it couldn't possibly make a big difference. A smile shows you are kind and easily approachable. It's a win-win for everyone.

9. Complete a task for someone.

Much like offering your help to someone, you can simply complete a task without asking or being asked to do so. This can be something as simple as cleaning up a mess someone else made or clearing the table for your waitress.

10. Offering patience

Patience doesn't come easy, especially in our fast-paced society. By simply being patient with an individual, you can make them feel more comfortable. The times when people are kind to me, are the things that stick with me.

I hope you found a few new ways to be kind from this post. Please remember that being kind is FREE. It doesn't cost a thing to just show a little compassion, offer patience, or show interest.

Grab your Random Acts of Kindness Bucket List printable!

It's natural human behavior to focus on the bad things that happen. Therefor, showing a little kindness, can truly make a huge impact on someone's day and possibly, someone's life.

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What is kindness and 18 ways to become kinder + Psychologist's advice

What does it mean to be a kind person? Do we need kindness and what does a person get by doing good deeds? We sometimes ask ourselves these questions and think: what does it really mean to be kind?

Some scientific facts . Scientists have proven that good deeds make a person happier. And that's why. When we do a good deed and help others, the level of the dopamine hormone, which is also called the happiness hormone, rises in the body. Plus, at the same time, our body produces the hormone oxytocin, which has a beneficial effect on the heart, lowers blood pressure and slows down the aging of the body. Isn't that a reason to do a good deed?

So, let's understand what kindness is. After all, everyone understands it in their own way.

Kindness is not only helping others, sometimes it is the ability to restrain emotions, keep silent somewhere and extinguish the emerging conflict, tactfully conduct a conversation with a person who is unpleasant for some reason.

Kindness has its own holiday - World Kindness Day, which has been celebrated annually on November 13 since 2009.

Some people want to be kind, but by nature they don't know how to do something good for others.

Let me give you an example of my client who turned to me with a request to help her acquire the qualities of a kind person. Her monologue struck me. Not because she had previously lived such a life, but with courage and determination, since not everyone is able to admit this. Here is a short excerpt from her confession:

“Elena, I am an evil person and I really want to become kinder. But I don't know how to "remake" myself. I'm 35, I don't have a child, I don't have a husband, I don't even have close friends. All my friends ran away from me because of my terrible character. I have always envied others, it always seemed to me that they are all more successful than me - richer, smarter, more successful. And I thought it's better to be alone, it's easier. I graduated from a prestigious university and made great progress up the career ladder. True, for this I had to “sit out” a colleague. I know that this is dishonorable, and it is wrong to do so, but I really wanted to quickly get a good position. As a result, my colleagues shun me, no one really communicates with me. I don’t like companies either, and people generally annoy me. I understand that something needs to be done, to somehow correct the situation, otherwise I will be left alone forever. But how? How to be kinder to people? What to do for this? - Irina, 35 years old.

Irina did the main thing: she realized the problem and came for help, now we are actively working on solving her problem. And there are even positive developments. But still work and work.

What conclusion can be drawn from Irina's story? Acceptance of other people as they are, lack of censure is the main difference between good people.

The one who chooses the path of kindness, for whom help, support, participation in the fate of others is a natural need, will always see only the good in people.

“Kindness is what the deaf can hear and the blind can see” – Mark Twain.

Kindness is a spiritual quality, which is expressed in a caring attitude towards other people, animals and the environment, a constant desire to do something good. This is not a one-time act to clear one's own conscience and improve karma, but a stable life position of a person.

Kindness in simple words is attention, mercy, disinterested help, care, generosity, benevolence and responsiveness.

But the concept of "kindness" has somehow become synonymous with weak will or, even worse, stupidity. More than once I heard from others that “this fool gave things to someone, it would be better if she sold them. Let even for a penny, but not for nothing to give.

Why is that? Why is such a good deed perceived as stupidity? In my opinion, on the contrary, the woman showed mercy and compassion by donating things to those in need.

Who is a kind person? This is a person :

  • is responsive and attentive to everyone, regardless of the degree of kinship and acquaintance;
  • confident in the correctness of his actions, even if it threatens him personally with some negative consequences;
  • well-mannered and polite towards everyone without exception;
  • who does not feel hostility towards other people, regardless of their religion, skin color and other features that distinguish him from himself;
  • protecting and protecting the weaker;
  • doing good deeds without expecting anything in return;
  • able to listen, not imposing his opinion and not judging others.

All these signs of kindness can be replaced by one word - humanity . It would seem that everything is simple. But then why are there less and less good people who meet these criteria?!

Is it necessary to be kind

In our difficult time, you can buy a lot. The only pity is that kindness and responsiveness cannot be found on the shelves in stores. But, fortunately, these qualities can be developed at any age.

“In the inner world of man, kindness is the sun” – Victor Hugo.

Answering the question: “Why do we need to be kind?” Let's see if kindness affects our lives, and if so, in what way.

Welcome is always returned . Life experience proves that good always returns. Of course, there is no scientific evidence for this phenomenon, but many have noticed that as soon as they do a good deed, after a while they receive some kind of gift of fate, albeit an insignificant one.

Good people live longer . This is because a good deed is good for health (I already talked about this at the beginning). That is why people who experience fewer negative emotions and do not harm others live longer.

Kind people become more attractive with age . According to cosmetologists and physiognomists, angry and envious people are constantly in tension, and this, of course, affects their appearance in the form of deep wrinkles on the forehead and in the nasolabial folds. Kind people also have an imprint on their face, but it is completely different: cheerful sparks in the eyes, a charming scattering of mimic wrinkles in the corners of the eyes from frequent smiles.

Good people never get lonely . And this is easily explained: it is pleasant to communicate with such people, they are excellent friends, always ready to help. Kind people, as it were, attract people who are just as open and positive.

Kind people achieve their goals faster . They don't piss off colleagues, no. But they always have someone in their environment who can help with advice, support, guide, and so on.

So do you think it's good to be kind or bad? Is kindness a sign of stupidity or generosity of the soul? In my opinion, the answer is obvious.

And if you have read the article up to this point, it means that you want to change yourself and your life, and you want to know what you need to do to be kind. And I will definitely help you with this.

How to be kind

So let's go. Effective tips to help you become kinder.

Smile is your weapon

Remember the simple formula: smile + kindness = kindness. Always start any communication, acquaintance with a smile. A smile will set your interlocutor to positive, disarm, relax. It is always easier to find a common language with a person who sincerely smiles. Plus, a smile will give you strength and self-confidence.

Develop empathy in yourself

You need to be able to empathize. If you don't know how, study. Because only kind and sympathetic people possess this quality. Find time for relatives/colleagues/acquaintances to just listen and provide moral support to the person. Express your sympathy in simple words: "I understand you" or "I share your feelings / emotions." Such words of support can be a salvation for another person.

Suppress your irritation

Even if you really want to say something offensive to your interlocutor, hold back the impulse and try to look at the situation from the outside. It is possible that the person did not want to offend you at all, and with your answer you will aggravate the situation for a long time, if not forever. Is it worth it?!

Show attention to your loved ones

Very often, even kind people make one significant mistake: they care about strangers so much that they completely forget to pay attention to their closest ones. And it shouldn't be. There is another category of people who do good deeds exclusively for strangers. Thus, increasing their importance and social status. Such a selfish goodness. But is it good? How to look. In order not to fall into either the first or the second category, do not forget about your closest people. Get your priorities right and communicate with your family daily. Even if you are very tired or not in the mood, at least just refrain from criticizing loved ones and quarrels over trifles. After all, this is where kindness begins.

Make communicative "gifts"

What could be easier than saying hello to a cashier in a store or complimenting a colleague? But we don't even do that. Train your kindness, make it a rule to greet strangers every day, thank your loved ones, compliment your friends and family. You will see that such “gifts” not only make others happy, but also charge you with positive energy.

Always be an optimist

It's no secret that optimists turn the globe. It is easier for such people to overcome any life difficulties. An optimist will not commit a bad deed for mercantile purposes, because he is sure that he will succeed anyway.

To become kinder, try to look at life a little more optimistically and find the positive even in small things.

Learn to forgive

Any anger or resentment that builds up inside of us harms us. A kind person never keeps “bad” emotions inside. Learn to forgive and let go of negative situations in your life. Look at the situation from the outside, draw conclusions and move on.

Be sincere and unselfish

Insincerity is always noticeable. You don't have to pretend to be kind, you just have to be. Real goodness comes from the heart. A selfless person never thinks whether to do a good deed or not, and what benefit he will receive. He just helps: with advice, action, money.

Start your morning with gratitude

Make it a rule to say thank you every morning: parents for the gift of life, husband/wife for attention and care, colleagues for help and support, boss for the opportunity to work and develop. There will always be someone to thank for. This useful ritual will charge you with positive and give you strength for the whole day. Checked!

Be generous

How is human kindness manifested? Of course, one of its manifestations is generosity. And whenever you have the opportunity to share something with someone in need, be sure to do so. This does not mean that you have to give the last and become needy yourself, no. You can help with deed, advice, elementary support. Participation and empathy is no less important than the material component.

Learn to apologize

Some people can't say the simple word "sorry". They see an apology as a sign of weakness. In fact, only the strong and kind can admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness for them. Forget about your pride and learn to get out of guilt, that is, to apologize. You will feel how it will become easier for you when you learn how to do it.

Avoid conflicts

All points of contention can and should be resolved peacefully. Do not waste your energy on negativity in the form of quarrels and scandals. As one of the ancients said: “It is ugly to argue if you are not right; and if he is right, then there is no need. Stick to that position and don't get into an argument. Restraint is the privilege of the smart and kind.

Do what you like

To become kinder, you need to find your own way of self-realization. Start doing what really brings you joy and pleasure. You don't have to quit your job right away and look for a new one. You can express yourself in hobbies or hobbies.

Use affirmations

It is necessary to show care and support not only to others, but also to yourself. This is where positive affirmations can help you. For example, you are in a hurry and something is not working out for you. How do we usually say in such a case? "Oh, I'm doing too slowly, I can't do it, I don't have time." But after all, the same meaning can be conveyed by another phrase, more optimistic: "Not everything is perfect yet, but I'm trying and I will definitely make it to the deadline if I speed up a little. " That's better, isn't it?

Learn to pamper yourself

Every person has a period when he feels irritated and tired. At such a moment, you do not need to endure with all your might and move on. You need to relax and unwind. Forget that you are an adult, responsible and so on. Treat yourself, watch your favorite movie or go to the cinema, you can do it in company or alone. Don't blame yourself for this short break from being an adult. Remember, to be effective in every way, you need to be able to take care of yourself first.

Learn to accept compliments

You need to be able not only to speak, but also to receive compliments. We are often very critical of ourselves and perceive compliments addressed to us as insincerity or flattery. But it's not like that. When you compliment another person, do you do it from the heart? Why then can't you believe that someone else does the same and actually sees you as smart, handsome, charming, and so on?

Live all your emotions

We need all emotions: both positive and negative. Positive ones inspire and give strength, negative ones help to better understand yourself and others, learn to draw conclusions and move on, change and become better. Therefore, you should not be upset if some kind of negative experience happened, on the contrary, you need to analyze it and understand why it happened and what to do so that this does not happen again.

Remember: kindness starts small!

What does this mean? This means that the first thing you need to learn to do is to notice the world around you. Start showing kindness today to yourself, your household, pets, neighbors, and colleagues. That is, to those who are here - at arm's length. There is no need to postpone the list of good deeds for the mythical next Monday. Stop, look around and think: maybe at this very moment someone needs your help or support. So why wait until Monday?

Psychological advice

What is a kind person? This is a person with certain qualities. A person who can empathize and support. A person who is ready to help in difficult times, not hoping to get anything in return. A person from whom such positive energy emanates that it charges everyone around. Do you want to be called a kind person? Then here are some more tips from psychologists.

Advice 1 : Be grateful and appreciate what you have. If it so happened that you have no relatives, you can thank higher powers or fate. For what? For food, a roof over your head, for beautiful nature or weather. Appreciate your sight, hearing, the ability to walk, talk, hear.

Tip 2 : Learn not to interrupt. Not many people can be able to listen without interrupting. Often we are impatient and do not give the other person the opportunity to speak, ask clarifying questions or admire / resent / criticize, but interrupt the opponent. Learn to listen and develop patience - this is a very valuable quality.

Tip 3 : Criticize less. Not only others, but also yourself. Do not scold yourself if you did not have time or did something wrong, or made a mistake. The one who does nothing makes no mistakes.

Tip 4 : Don't start fights. Learn not to notice the little things in everyday matters. Did the child leave a toy on the floor? Husband threw socks not in the basket with dirty linen, but nearby? Did your wife not wash the dishes in the evening? Or maybe she's just tired today? The toy can be removed or moved, the socks can simply be sent to the basket, and the dishes can be washed tomorrow. These are not global things, these are trifles that are not worth quarreling with loved ones because of them.

Tip 5 : Grow. Read books, watch movies with a good (kind) ending - this is also one of the ways to become kinder. Goodness can be learned from good examples.

Tip 6 : Associate with kind people. It's always easier to learn from someone else's experience. Communicating with benevolent people, you learn from their example kindness, generosity, humanity.

Tip 7 : Charge yourself with positivity and smile more often.

Tip 8 : Don't be offended. Accumulating resentment within yourself means harming your own health. It is better to tell the offender about your feelings or turn on critical thinking and analyze what happened. Is the situation really worth being offended and wasting your energy?

Tip 9 : Don't push yourself. Imposed good is evil. If you see that someone needs help, do not immediately rush to help, just offer first. If a person refuses help, do not impose your opinion and do not try to do it for him. Without mistakes, it is impossible to gain the experience that is needed to become wiser and kinder.

According to a survey conducted in Russia last year, a third of Russians answered that someone who is ready to help and support is kind. The same number said that a kind person is sympathetic and not indifferent. Both of them are, of course, right. What do you think, who can be called a good person? And is it good for them to be?

I do not know how you will answer, but I will express my opinion with the words from the song of the cat Leopold: “The brighter the sun shines, the sparrow chirps. It’s more fun for the good to live in this world.”

8 secrets how to start the day right, to be kind and productive

  • Health

As the morning starts, the whole day will pass. This wisdom is relevant to many of us. If after sleep there is no strength and desire to do something, you should not expect high productivity from yourself.

January 27, 20232

Source:
iStockphoto

Physiologists have long determined: our productivity during the day depends on the morning awakening and actions in the first hour after sleep . If you get yourself some new good habits, waking up will be easy, your mood will be cheerful, and your performance will be high. Throughout the day, good habits will help you avoid fatigue, irritation, protect against stress and keep you optimistic until the evening.

The scenario of getting up at the annoying sound of an alarm clock, getting ready in a hurry so as not to be late for work, having a snack on the run or coffee on an empty stomach is not the best start to the day. How is it right? This was told to Doctor Peter by the chief physician of the Bud Zdorov clinic in Krasnodar, therapist Inna Melikova.

Ideal Scenario

A good morning should look something like this: You wake up early in a perfect mood. You get up, slowly, performing all hygiene rituals, eat hearty and tasty, after which you slowly go about your business or start work, household tasks.

By lunchtime, you can find out that more than half of the planned tasks are easily completed. You still have plenty of time for your hobbies, pleasant worries and relaxation. If you want your morning to start the same way and your day to be productive, try putting these tips into practice.

Read also

Learn to get up early

If you get up early in the morning, you can do a lot of accumulated work. It is in the morning hours that we feel the maximum energy and vitality. But it is important that you rest after sleeping 8-9 hours before this. Physiologically, the ideal time to wake up is 6-7 am.

At this time, the processes are maximally tuned to rise - the metabolism is accelerated, the temperature rises, blood flow accelerates. Adjust your regimen smoothly by shifting your daily bedtime and wakeup routine by 15 minutes. Try to go to bed no later than 21-22 hours. Before going to bed, ventilate the room, remove all gadgets, protect yourself from negative information.

Drink a glass of water on an empty stomach

Many experts say that a glass of water on an empty stomach helps improve digestion, wake up, and refresh your mouth. You can add a circle of cucumber, a slice of lemon to the water. Water helps to solve the problem of constipation, boost metabolism, prevent dehydration, improve appearance and well-being.

See also

Do some simple exercises

Morning exercise is a great way to cheer up. You can do three or four simple exercises to speed up blood circulation, wake up, and improve your mood. A great option is morning workouts in the gym, they are much more effective than evening classes, the motivation for them is higher.

Ventilate the room

It is useful to pay attention to creating the right indoor climate. During the night, the windows are usually closed, carbon dioxide accumulates inside the rooms, which provokes a feeling of fatigue, weakness, malaise with a headache. In the morning, make it a rule to open the window or window for at least 10 minutes. If this is a problem, use an air conditioner to freshen up the air and cool it down a bit.

Take a contrast shower

To fully cheer up, wake up and start the day, it is worth taking a contrast shower. It is useful immediately after charging or training. The body will feel light and energized. The alternation of water temperature helps to improve the condition of the skin, increase vascular tone, has a hardening property, strengthens the immune system, and helps to normalize the work of the heart.

Read also

Eat breakfast properly

Many people skip breakfast, preferring to go to work with only tea or coffee, not eating. It is not right. Skipping breakfast can reduce productivity by depriving the body of the calories it needs to be active. Reduced glucose levels lead to lethargy, drowsiness, the brain works worse. Protein breakfasts, complex carbohydrates will be useful. But you should not indulge in sweets, sugar gives bursts of blood glucose, which negatively affects metabolism.

Make a plan for the day

A useful habit that allows you to discipline yourself. Make a plan of the most important and secondary things that you need to do today. After completing each task, make a note in your plan.

Leave home early and walk

It is important for us to get at least 15 minutes of physical activity every day.


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