Teaching kids skills

Bright Horizons | Teaching Kids Life Skills: 7 Essential Life Skills to Help Your Child Succeed

What Are the Most Important Life Skills for Kids to Learn?

Focus and Self-Control
Perspective-Taking
Communication
Making Connections
Critical Thinking
Taking on Challenges
Self-Directed, Engaged Learning

What Are Life Skills?

Teachers sometimes describe these skills as “learning to learn” skills, which can be developed through intentional daily activities.

Below, we explore the seven essential life skills and offer some simple ways to nurture them.

Life Skill Activities to Incorporate into Your Child’s Daily Routine

1. Focus and Self-Control

Children thrive on schedules, habits, and routines, which not only create a feeling of security, but also help children learn self-control and focus. Talk with your child about what to expect each day. Organize your home so your child knows where to put shoes, coats, and personal belongings. We live in a noisy, distraction-filled world, so quiet activities like reading a book, enjoying sensory activities, or completing a puzzle together can help your child slow down and increase focus.

2. Perspective-Taking

Thinking about another’s point of view doesn’t come naturally to most children, but it can be developed. Discuss characters’ feelings and motivations in the books you read, e.g., “I wonder why the cat and the pig wouldn’t help the little red hen.” Make observations about how others are feeling, e.g., “Alex was really sad that he didn’t get a turn. I wonder what we can do to make him feel better.”

3. Communication

Children need high-touch personal interactions every day to build healthy social-emotional skills, including the ability to understand and communicate with others. While the pace at which they develop these skills may vary, children need to learn how to “read” social cues and listen carefully. They must consider what they want to communicate and the most effective way to share it. Just talking with an interested adult can help build these skills. Spend time every day listening and responding to your child without distractions.

4. Making Connections

True learning, says Galinsky, occurs when we can see connections and patterns between seemingly disparate things. The more connections we make, the more sense and meaning we make of the world. Young children begin to see connections and patterns as they sort basic household items like toys and socks. Simple acts, such as choosing clothing appropriate for the weather, helps them build connections. Point out more abstract connections in life, or in stories you read, e.g., “This book reminds me of when we picked sea shells at the beach.”

5. Critical Thinking

We live in a complex world in which adults are required to analyze information and make decisions about myriad things every day. One of the best ways to build critical thinking is through rich, open-ended play. Make sure your child has time each day to play alone or with friends. This play might include taking on roles (pretending to be fire fighters or super heroes), building structures, playing board games, or playing outside physical games, such as tag or hide-and-go-seek. Through play, children formulate hypotheses, take risks, try out their ideas, make mistakes, and find solutions—all essential elements in building critical thinking.

6. Taking on Challenges

One of the most important traits we can develop in life is that of resilience—being able to take on challenges, bounce back from failure, and keep trying. Children learn to take on challenges when we create an environment with the right amount of structure—not so much as to be limiting, but enough to make them feel safe. Encourage your child to try new things and allow reasonable risk, such as climbing a tree or riding a bike. Offer a new challenge when she seems ready, e.g., “I think you’re ready to learn to tie your shoes. Let’s give it a try.” Focus more on effort than achievement, e.g. , “Learning to tie your shoes was really hard, but you kept trying. Well done.”

7. Self-Directed, Engaged Learning

A child who loves learning becomes an adult who is rarely bored in life. To encourage a love of learning, try to limit television and encourage plenty of reading, play, and open-ended exploration. Model curiosity and enthusiasm for learning in your own life by visiting the library together, keeping craft supplies, making games available, and allowing for some messes at home.

By following these simple tips, you can easily help your child build essential skills.

Bright Horizons Podcast: Lemons to Lemonade with Four Ingredients

On this episode of the Work-Life Equation, turn those parenting lemons into lemonade! It might not seem like it, but your child is more predictable than you think—and each stage of your child’s development, along with every meltdown, is a gateway to skill-building for your little one. Hear early childhood experts Ellen Galinsky and Rachel discuss the science behind parenting that can turn frustration into great skills for life.

65 Life Skills to Teach Kids at Every Age | MommyPoppins

We were about half a day into the great pandemic-induced homeschool experiment of 2020 when I lost my cool for the first time. With a full-time work schedule for my husband and myself, plus three kids to teach, how exactly were we going to manage?

I worried about workspace, bandwidth (both our Wi-Fi connection and my own), and common core math problems. And then, I decided to sort of... give up. Sure, we'll do our best to keep up with the schoolwork of three kids in two schools in three vastly different stages of their educational journeys, but we'll also focus on some good, old-fashioned life skills.

Day 1 found me schooling my son on how to make his teen-diet staple, ramen noodles, and a home ec class full of chocolate chip cookies for my younger daughters. I mostly stayed back, and let my girls do the measuring and mixing that I typically like to micromanage. On Day 2 we sewed up the holes in some favorite stuffed animals. By Day 3, my youngest was eagerly awaiting the day's lesson, and that inspired me to reach out to colleagues and friends to put together this list of life skills. Of course, most of these essential skills are worth teaching kids at any time but it feels apt during this forced slowdown. Without further ado, 65 real-life lessons to teach your kids.

If you're looking for more at-home and indoor Boredom Busters, we have plenty to recommend, including science experiments and crafts.

Life Skills for Toddlers and Preschoolers

1. You're stuck at home for the foreseeable future, so why not take that diaper off to try potty training.

2. Timely, and topical: Teach toddlers how to wash their hands for 20 whole seconds.

3. Even toddlers can learn how to sort toys and clean up.

4. While you're not going anywhere or in a rush, let little ones pick out their wildest outfits and dress themselves!

5. Fill up the watering can and water the plants together.

RELATED: Coronavirus Pandemic Guide for Parents: Hundreds of Activities, Tips, and Resources

Even young kids can help with laundry by trying to match socks. Photo by Sara Marentette

6. Lighten your laundry chores by having kids play "match the socks."

7. Work on learning how to snap, zip, or button jackets.

8. Let them wash their own faces.

9. For preschoolers: Take the time to teach them your phone number and address.

10. Show them how to dial 9-1-1 after discussing what sort of emergency necessitates it.

11. Enjoy the spring air and teach them how to master pedaling a tricycle or bike with training wheels.

A song or even a YouTube video might help kids finally learn to tie their shoes. Photo by Rose Gordon Sala

Life Skills for Early Elementary School Students

12. Make good use of their YouTube obsession by showing them this video that teaches how to tie shoes.

13. Hand over the feather duster and let them chip in with the cleaning.

14. Similarly, teach them to sweep.

Kids as young as kindergarten can wield a vacuum. Photo by Rose Gordon Sala

15. Or, show them how to vacuum.

16. Have them help with dinner prep by setting the table...

17. ...And clean up when it's time to clear the table.

18. Engage them in laundry day by teaching them how to separate the clothes by color.

19. Take the training wheels off and conquer two-wheeled solo bike riding.

20. Teach them how to make a simple sandwich for their lunch ... and yours!

21. Get a little help with garbage duty by teaching them how to take the trash out.

22. Show them how to properly wash the windows or the bathroom mirrors. Most will love to wield the Windex bottle.

Learning a simple stitch will pay off well into the adult years!

23. Share basic sewing skills.

24. Let them fetch the mail.

25. Clear out the piggy bank and roll coins or teach them how to make change. (Bonus math lesson!)

26. Got any analog clocks in your house? Now's the time to learn how to tell time.

27. School them on basic first-aid skills.

Photo by Sara Marentette

28. Set them free with a recipe for no-bake cookies.

29. Let them grate cheese for homemade mac-and-cheese or taco night. Watch those fingertips as they work.

30. Show them how to make a bed.

Photo by Sara Marentette

31. Once the laundry is washed and folded, let the kids put it away.

Life Skills for Tweens

32. Look at a map and teach them how to read it—without the help of Google.

33. Get them a cursive writing book or download some worksheets.

34. Show them how to clean the bathroom, toilets and all.

35. Let them load the dishwasher after dinner.

36. Same goes for the laundry machine! They should be able to take over this chore with some help.

37. Teach them basic kitchen skills using the stove: scrambled eggs are a great place to start.

38. Another tasty option: grilled cheese.

RELATED: 20+ (Mostly Free) Online Learning Resources, Apps, and Games

A basic cookie dough is easily mastered by kids. Photo by Rose Gordon Sala

39. Set them loose with a basic baking recipe. They might need some help getting it in and out of the oven, but should be able to measure and mix!

40. Set them up with a typing program. Keyboarding Without Tears is offering its program for FREE right now. Typing.com is another FREE online resource.

41. Pen an old-fashioned letter to friends or family, then show them how to add a stamp and mail it.

42. Teach them how to do their own hair: simple braids and ponytails should be easy at this age.

43. Show them how to properly wrap a present.

44. Teach them how to create a calendar or daily schedule and help them stick to it.

45. Stocking up on essentials? Let them handle the money and count the change.

Simple knife skills are a handy skill. Photo by Anne Marceaux

46. Let them learn basic knife skills in the kitchen, cutting soft fruits. Even better if you have a kid-sized knife set.

47. Banks are still open; why not start a savings account for your kid and teach them to make a deposit.

48. Build some STEM skills and teach them to make an iMovie.

49. Put them to work in the yard: rake leaves or mulch, plant flowers, and pull weeds.

50. Show them how to add their events to your shared family calendar, whether it hangs in the hallway or lives on the internet.

Send them to college knowing how to do their own tie.

Life Skills for Teens

51. Teach them how to tie a tie. My son learned on YouTube.

52. By now, they should be able to sort, wash, and fold the laundry.

53. Take a night off: Let them cook a full meal and clean up when they're done.

54. Teach them how to properly iron out wrinkles.

55. Impart some basic car maintenance skills, like how to check the oil and change a tire.

56. Take them to the gas station when you need to fill up and let them do it.

57. Show them how to plunge a clogged toilet.

58. Teach them how to make and stick to a budget.

59. Help them open a checking account.

60. Teach them how to keep track of important papers ... like their new checking account records!

61. School them on how to write a professional email. No shorthand or emojis allowed.

62. Help them craft their first résumé.

63. Have them memorize their social security number.

64. Power up the lawnmower and let your teen tackle the chore.

65. Nearing 18? Make sure they know how to register to vote!

Photos by the author except where noted

What skills to develop in a child and how it will help in the future

Photo: Nicolas Picard / Unsplash

85% of a person's success in a profession depends on soft skills. Together with Natalia Gatanova, psychologist, mother and scientific director of the MKEBI Foundation, we figure out what it is and how to develop it in young children

Scientists divide human skills into two conditional groups: professional hard skills and supraprofessional soft skills.

Hard skills - highly specialized skills for performing certain tasks at work. For example, a programmer's skill is to write code in python. hard skills can be learned at school, university, at work, courses or trainings.
Soft skills (“soft” skills) is a set of social skills that help a person solve problems in life: communication, leadership, teamwork, people management, emotional intelligence. Soft skills cannot be learned in training, they are formed in childhood and develop throughout life.

A simple model of professional competencies in the form of a doll. “Hard” skills inside, “flexible” skills outside (Photo: Moscow School of Management Skolkovo)

According to the results of a joint study by scientists from Harvard, Stanford and the Carnegie Endowment, soft skills determine the success of a person in the profession by 85%, and only 15% depends on highly specialized skills.

In a survey by the UK's Sutton Trust, 88% of young people, 94% of employers and 97% of teachers surveyed said they considered "life skills" as or more important than academic ones. The changing VUCA world requires a person to quickly adapt to the new. VUCA is an acronym for instability (volatility), uncertainty (uncertainty), complexity (complexity), and ambiguity (ambiguity). It is important now to pay attention to the development of soft skills in a child to help them cope with changes and not get lost in the future.

Like adults, the most important skills for children are communication skills, while you need to pay attention to leadership and group work, says Natalia Gatanova, scientific director of the MKEBI Foundation.

Communication skills. The child must learn to communicate: introduce themselves, get to know each other, agree to play together. If necessary, ask for help from adults or peers, offer to provide it yourself. Explain exactly what they need and why. By developing communication skills, the child learns to accept different points of view and argue his own.
Leadership qualities. Leadership is confidence in yourself and your abilities. The child learns to take responsibility for the decisions made and the people around. If no one wants to play, he will offer to start. A toddler can feel invisible and unreal if he constantly waits for someone to organize the game for him or solve all the problems. Children should feel like full-fledged people who know how to achieve their goals and make the right decisions for this.
Working in a group. The ability to work and be in a group with other children helps to achieve big goals, compete and negotiate, develops leadership and communication. Working in a group, the child is not afraid to accept the rules of the game, to maintain his role and enjoy it.

Six major megatrends that are changing the world. From the Skills of the Future report

Global Education Futures and WorldSkills Russia experts recommend developing ten key skills that people will need in the future:

Attention control and concentration. Will help you cope with information noise and overload, manage processes and solve complex problems.
Creative thinking. In the future, routine tasks will be automated, so the skills of creative thinking and the creation of creative ideas will help to remain a sought-after specialist in the labor market.
Logic. Logic develops computational thinking. Helps to solve complex problems and make informed decisions.
Spatial thinking and imagination. Helps to correlate oneself with the surrounding space, imagine new objects and navigate in it.
Information handling skills. Digital literacy and programming skills are as important as reading skills. These are basic skills that everyone needs in a new complex world.
Self-organization and time management. Zoomers and millennials are more likely to choose a free schedule and change jobs. Remote work is becoming the norm and sets a new era - self-organization. Skills will help you manage time, projects and life.
Emotional intelligence. Through emotions we react to what is happening around us. The skill helps to manage your emotional state, avoid neurosis, depression and apathy.
Intercultural communication. Global changes are forcing economies, corporations and communities to come together to solve common problems. Intercultural communication skills help build relationships with people from other areas and countries.
The ability to learn, unlearn and relearn. Self-learning helps you learn skills on your own in a rapidly changing world and adapt to change.
Critical thinking. The skill helps to think clearly and rationally, to look for a logical connection between facts and to formulate strong arguments.

In her TED talk, teacher Rimma Rappoport talks about how children can develop soft skills in Russian language lessons0097 RBC Trends ), the child understands his needs if the mother adequately responds to them. That is, if a mother feeds her son when he is cold, he develops an incorrect understanding of himself at an unconscious level. Already at the age of three, the child wants to decide for himself: what cartoon to watch, what to wear and what toys to play. He imagines that the world is built around his desires. If a child does not understand himself, he cannot satisfy his needs.

In the theory of self-determination, there are three basic human needs.

To be accepted — the child plays with other children, feels needed and useful.
To be independent - the child understands that he can change something if he wants to. For example, put toys in your own way or choose clothes.
Be successful and competent - the child knows that if he is given a difficult task, he will cope with it. Adults may not pay attention to this, explaining with the phrase “you will grow up, you will understand,” but this is not true. You need to treat the child as a complete person.

Psychological comfort and health depend on the satisfaction of basic needs. If a child learns to understand and meet his needs in childhood, he will grow up to be an independent adult who responds calmly to difficulties. Such adults are sure that any problem can be solved.

Circles and sections develop, but you should not rely only on additional education. Soft skills are formed from birth, so it is better to set a personal example for a child and take him seriously.

Personal example. The child adopts behavior patterns by imitating adults. Parents set patterns of communication if they openly communicate with people, express feelings, ask for help, solve problems. For example, if you want your child to say hello, say hello yourself.
Attitude. A child is not a small adult who begins to live after 18 years of age, but a full-fledged person. Take your child seriously, ask his opinion. If you give a choice, it must be real. For example, the offer to choose a cup for milk is imaginary, because the child will still have to drink milk. Better ask what he wants to drink: tea, water, milk or juice.
Inner environment. Relatives, friends and acquaintances are the inner circle of the child. They set patterns for all forms of communication that develop soft skills. If a child comes to a development group with an atmosphere of mutual respect and the opportunity for self-expression, soft skills will develop. At the same time, sending a shy child to a development group and expecting him to become a leader in it is not worth it. It is better to give the child a responsible task with the right to make mistakes. If there is a bakery on the ground floor of the house, assign a child to be responsible for the bread in the house. This is a task with real actions: take money, go to the store, choose bread and bring it home.

In order to see the difficulties with the development of soft skills in a child in time, look at his behavior. For example, if a child comes to a group of children, but cannot find a friend to play in 5-10 minutes, then he has difficulties. The child may not say hello, hide, or stand aside for a long time and watch other children play. Try to talk to him and find out the reasons for this behavior, contact a child psychologist.

Talk to kindergarten teachers, school teachers or parents of classmates. If it is difficult for adults to work with a child: he refuses everything, bullies the guys, “pulls the blanket over himself” - and this is not a one-time phenomenon, then there are difficulties.

Psychotherapist Andrei Kurpatov in the book Happy Child. Universal Rules” writes that not understanding the reasons for children's crying, parents defiantly leave the child alone with his misfortune, making a lot of mistakes in emotional education

Soft skills develop gradually throughout life. Some skills form others. For example, communication develops emotional intelligence and the ability to manage people. There is no set age when a child will grow up and trade one set of soft skills for others.

In order for the child to understand his needs and be able to meet them, the mother must correctly respond to the emotions and demands of the child in childhood and give the right feedback in a timely manner. Then, if a child breaks a toy and cries, he will understand that he is crying because of a broken toy, and not a bad mother. You need to believe in your child, love him and give him the opportunity to live, and not prepare for life in the future.

To develop your child's soft skills:

Respond correctly to needs at an early age, give timely feedback. So the child learns to understand himself and satisfy basic needs.
Pay attention to communication, leadership and group work - these are the most important soft skills in a child.
Lead by example in how you behave, communicate, and work with others.
Treat your child like a complete adult with your own opinion.
Watch your inner circle - ask relatives to set the right example, send the child to development groups with an atmosphere of mutual respect.
See a specialist if your child has difficulty developing communication and soft skills.
Love and respect your child.

Skills training

Skills training in terms of Applied Behavior Analysis includes the following steps:

Diagnosis of the initial level of skills development;
Drawing up an individualized program;
Training and supervision of parents and specialists:

Objective progress tracking;
Modification of the program depending on the progress of the child.

We all know that children with autism face many challenges when learning anything. Ordinary children grasp information through conversation, play, communication with peers, and in other words, during daily and ordinary activities. Autistic children don't learn the same way. What is a normal flow of information for a typically developing child, for an autistic child looks like a chaos that causes stress and frustration. Therefore, it is necessary to use learning strategies that will help the autistic child to master the skills, but without stress and being interested in what he is doing.

Early Skill Development Diagnostics

Before any skills can be taught to a child, it is necessary to determine the child's initial level of functioning or what he is currently able to do. The Behavioral Specialist has an arsenal of techniques with which he can determine the initial level of development of skills. Based on this information, a training program will be compiled.

Drawing up an individualized program

The program is aimed at developing in the child the most necessary and appropriate skills for his development. As you progress, the acquired skills will be used in the development of more complex skills.

Together with the parent, the Behavior Specialist prioritizes what to teach the child. For example, a 15-year-old child who gives a picture with the wrong color on the instruction "give me blue" or "give me red" may not need to continue teaching colors, but refocus on how to fold laundry, how to make a sandwich, how to sweep the floor. , that is, in the direction of independence skills. On the other hand, if the child is 3-4 years old, his program should include the development of verbal, imitative and other cognitive skills (eg, following instructions, visual matching), as well as play and social skills.

Skills are taught through various strategies. For example, during selection or categorization training, the block method can be used. The generalization of skills can occur using a strategy of random learning, and the formation of hygiene skills (washing hands, brushing teeth) using the method of step-by-step task analysis.

Training and supervision of parents and professionals

Behavior specialist will train professionals and parents in all strategies used.