Teaching kids emotions

Emotions Book Companions

This emotional awareness resource includes 5 book companions on popular children’s books that relate to feelings and emotions (The Color Monster; The Feelings Book; Glad Monster, Sad Monster; F is for Feelings; In My Heart).

Children will participate in classroom discussions and book chats, share their feelings in written form, and participate in fun, engaging activities that build emotional awareness and social skills.

This emotions book companion resource includes a detailed lesson plan, guided questions, anchor chart, writing response, and follow-up activities (printable and digital included) for all 5 books. Great for distance learning and remote teaching of social-emotional skills!

FREE Emotions Lesson & Feelings Journal

Help students learn to identify and process their feelings in an emotions journal.

Download a free lesson and activities on identifying and labeling emotions from the Emotions unit by clicking the image below and signing up.

Social-Emotional Learning Curriculum

The mind + heart Social Emotional Learning Curriculum includes 8 units with 5+ detailed, character education, research-based LESSONS filled with TONS of hands-on and mindful ACTIVITIES that encourage children to express themselves and build important emotional and social skills. It includes emotions for kids!

More About Teaching Emotions

Emotional Skills Books and Videos

Self Regulation Strategies, Books & Videos

Empathy Skills Books & Videos

PIN for Later

FREE Social Emotional Learning Email Series

Sign up for the social emotional learning email course filled with tips to get you started, lesson and activity ideas, PLUS tons of FREE resources you can access right away. Everything you need to teach social skills and emotional literacy in the classroom!

First Name

Personal Email Address

We use this field to detect spam bots. If you fill this in, you will be marked as a spammer.

I'd like to receive the free email course.

9 Ways To Teach Children About Feelings

I often tell my children to use their words when they are upset. I assume they know what they are feeling and can verbalize it to me. Wrong! It’s difficult for children to say what they are feeling because many times they don’t know what to name the feeling they are experiencing. Instead, they show us how they are feeling by throwing temper tantrums and having meltdowns. We first need to teach children the words to express their feelings before we require them to “use their words. ”

Young children can be taught basic emotions such as happy, mad, sad, and scared as early as two years old. As they get older, you can explain emotions such as feeling frustrated, nervous, shy, etc. to them.

Here are some ways you can help your child learn the language they need to express their feelings:

1. Sing songs to help young children learn how to express their feelings. I came across this version of a preschool classic, If you are happy and you know it at Sunflowersstorytime.com. It goes:

If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.

If you’re surprised and you know it say “Oh my!”

If you’re sad and you know it rub your eyes “Boo hoo”

If you’re scared and you know it shiver and shake.

If you’re sleepy and you know it close your eyes.

If you’re angry and you know it stomp your feet.

And always make sure end up with “happy” again.

They suggest having pictures of each emotion to show the kids as they sing the song.

2. Use games and activities to teach children about feelings.

Children like learning through playing and having fun. A fun game to help kids learn about feelings is Feelings Charades.

For this game you will need to make a feelings cube. Paste pictures of feeling faces on a tissue box. Have kids roll the box and whatever feeling face it lands on they have to act out.

You can find free feeling picture cards here.

You can also use the cards to play Memory. Simply print out two sets of Feeling Cards, shuffle them and then have your child find the matching Feelings Card.

3. Watch kid-friendly videos about feelings. Kids respond well to visual stimulation. Here are two videos I like to show kids to help them learn about feelings:

• Elf Feelings Video
• The Feeling Song

4. Get into the habit of labeling the feelings you believe your child is experiencing. For example, if your child runs up to you and hugs you as you walk through the door, you can say something like “someone is excited to see me” or “someone is happy I’m home. ” Labeling your child’s feelings as they happen helps them to build their feelings vocabulary.

5. When you read to your child, discuss how the characters in the story are feeling.

Point out any clues that lets you know what they are feeling such as facial expressions or behaviors. Then explain to your child why the characters feel the way they do. If your child is able to, let them take a turn identifying how the characters are feeling and why.

I like to read The Way I Feelto young children because it uses beautiful images to describe a range of feelings.

6. When your child does something that upsets someone else, let them know how their behavior might make others feel. For example, “When you called your sister names, she felt sad and her feelings were hurt. “ This will help your child be mindful of what they say and do to others. You can follow up by asking how they would feel if someone did the same thing to them. Encouraging your child to put themselves in someone else’s shoe teaches them how to be empathetic. Empathy is an important life skill that will allow your child to maintain positive relationships with other people.

7. Model appropriate ways to express feelings to your child. Children are always watching us and like sponges they soak everything up. Good and bad. If your child sees you expressing your feelings in a positive way, over time they learn to do the same. However, if they see you yelling and throwing things when you get upset, they are more likely to mimic this behavior.

8. Teach your child appropriate ways to express their emotions.

It’s important that children learn that it is OK to have their feelings. What matters is how they express them. When your child is calm, discuss with them ways they can calm down when they are upset. The ABC’s of Calming Down is a great resource that contains 26 alphabetized calm down strategies to help children calm down.

9. Praise your child when they use words to express their feelings. Having the self-control to express your feelings appropriately is no easy feat. There are many adults who are unable to do this. When your child tells you how they are feeling instead of having a complete melt down, praise them for doing so. Be very specific. For example, “I like how you told your sister that you were sad when she called you names. That was very mature of you.” Praising your child for practicing good behavior makes them more likely to do it again in the future. It also lets them know that you are watching them and notice when they do good things.

It is important that children learn how to identify and express their feelings in an appropriate manner. Kids who are able to express their feelings are less likely to have meltdowns and temper tantrums. They also have an easier time making friends and getting along with others. For additional resources on teaching children about feelings, check out these Feelings Task Cards.

In what ways do you foster your child’s emotional intelligence?

If you like this article you might also like these articles. (Click on images)

5 ways to teach your child to manage emotions

Understanding yourself and others, learning with pleasure, making friends and building trusting relationships - this is just a partial list of what high emotional intelligence is needed for. It is better to engage in its development already in childhood, when the psyche and brain are plastic, and learning is at its best. Together with Marina Kateeva, a psychologist and specialist in the development of emotional intelligence, we figured out how parents can help a child with this.

1. Learn to understand your own emotions

In our culture, it is not customary to share feelings and experiences, to talk everything out with loved ones, which is a common cause of misunderstanding and difficulties in relationships. To help your child build happier relationships in the future, you need to start with yourself. The first step is to get in the habit of listening to yourself, to your feelings and identifying them. What's going on inside there? How can it be called?

It is very important to distinguish one emotional state from another, to understand how mood changes during the day, to be a kind of observer, noticing and realizing the reasons for certain emotional reactions. nine0003

The next step is to name the feelings. It’s good if your dictionary has a lot of words denoting emotional states, but if you can’t find a suitable word, pick up a metaphor or come up with your own name, as in Viktor Lunin’s poem “Dad’s mood for breakfast is reading, mom’s mood is offensive…”.

Fortunately, today it is not necessary to use the old-fashioned "Dear Diary" to keep track of your condition. The easiest way is to set reminders on your phone every two hours and, following the reminder, devote literally five minutes to understanding emotions. What's happening? What I feel? What caused my condition? There are many applications that will send notifications themselves, ask leading questions and help you reflect. nine0003

• Zenify is a collection of exercises to help develop mindfulness. Set up a schedule, how often the application needs to be reminded of itself, and perform simple but very useful tasks. For example, listen to a short piece of music and analyze how it makes you feel.
• Jour is an electronic diary with a stock of leading questions. You can simply conduct it regularly, set up notifications, and complete introspection and reflection tasks developed by psychologists. nine0016
• Stoic is a smart diary. He not only reminds you that it is time to write a couple of lines about your own well-being, but also offers several topics. Over time, the program learns, analyzes the mood and habits of the user, on the basis of which it produces statistics and offers personalized questions.

The trap of the classic diary is that people only write in it when they are in a certain mood. As a result, very monotonous records can turn out, as if we are always in the same state. When a person clenches his fists or grits his teeth in anger, he is unlikely to think about what he feels and run to write it down in a diary. But the phone rang - and immediately reminded: what is this happening to you? nine0003

2. Talk about your feelings (it's not scary at all)

So, you know how to define your emotions, you have a rich "emotional" vocabulary. But how to express them? And if the emotion is not very (or very) unpleasant? Is it worth it? It is worth it, because the emotion will still manifest itself in your actions, words, reactions, and any attempt to hide it will give the child an extra reason to doubt his ability to understand and feel the other, as well as trust his feelings. And you should not imitate feelings and emotions that do not exist. The deceit will be exposed. nine0003

A typical situation: the child comes home from school, and the parents ask how things are going, because they need to ask. Are they really interested in it? Does the child want to talk about it? When we lose sight of the emotional component, we get a not very pleasant situation. Children immediately feel a double bottom: they seem to ask, but somehow impersonally, as if there is nothing to do before these school affairs. In this case, the child will quit "Everything is fine" and go to his room.

It is much better to speak sincerely:

• "Here you came from school so ruddy, disheveled, I'm very curious what happened to you during the day."
• “I see you are seriously puzzled by something. I am concerned about your condition. Would you like to tell me what happened?"
• “Listen, you are so inspired today! I can't help but ask: what was it like at school?

If for some reason you are not ready for a conversation - it happens, it is more honest to say about it and postpone all questions for later. “Van, I see you want to share with me, but now I’m in such a state (I’m excited, depressed, puzzled, and so on) that I can hardly be a good conversationalist. Let's talk in a couple of hours." Telling a child about himself, about his feelings is very important, through this he learns to be attentive to the emotional state of another, and also to talk about feelings. nine0003

3. Minimize Value Judgments

Both adults and children have a lot to worry about today, but the main stress factor is perhaps external evaluation, which can be encountered anywhere. And it's not just about the negative. Even the seemingly positive "Well done" or "What a smart girl you are" only exacerbate the situation, because they form an addiction. Every time the child does something, he will be in suspense waiting for this assessment.

Of course, we can't completely get rid of it. But it is in our power to form an understanding in the child that any judgment is the subjective opinion of another person. Everyone has their own vision, their own perception of the world and those around them.

It is important that the child has his own position on all issues: this way he will be less dependent on other people.

It is not necessary to agree with the child on everything. Do you have a different opinion? So you say! “You know, I heard your point of view, but I don’t think so. I have these arguments…” But at the same time, don’t push or insist, just share your position. nine0003

4. Help your child deal with strong emotions

Breathing exercises and other emotion management tactics are commonly spoken of in the context of intense anxiety, fear, and other negative experiences. But it is also important to be able to cope with intense joy. For example, a child has a birthday. In the morning he received a gift from his parents, which he dreamed of for a long time, then classmates should congratulate him, and in the evening the whole family should go to a pizzeria. Well, how can you sit still in a math lesson? He is filled with emotions. As in a situation of strong anger, there is a sea of ​​\u200b\u200benergy in it, which is important to direct in a constructive direction. nine0003

Sit down and breathe, count to three - time-tested techniques. They work. To find the use of overflowing energy, you can go for a run, throw out the trash, do push-ups. Physical activity is a great way out.

5. Draw, dance, sing, write and play with your child

Emotions give energy to creativity, serve as a kind of fuel and inspiration. And creativity, in turn, develops emotional intelligence, as it forces us to seek and find adequate means of expression, thanks to which we eventually understand the language of art without words. nine0003

In Creative Connection, American psychologist Natalie Rogers details how the expressive arts not only help develop emotional intelligence, but also help you better understand yourself. It contains many exercises and practical tips that will be useful to both teachers and parents.

Creativity is a powerful tool for self-expression and can be great to use with children. Sometimes it is much easier to describe an emotional state not with words, but with some other expressive means. For example, draw, and then discuss, explain what these colors, these shapes, and so on mean. In the same way, you can move, sing, dance. All means are good, the main thing is to be attentive to your feelings and those of those around you. nine0003

Illustrations: Shutterstock (Natasha_Chetkova)

Teaching children to manage their emotions

Development of the theme

Categories

Kirill Karpenko

In one study, it was found that the way parents regulate their emotions and the emotions of their children has a great influence on the development of the child and his academic success.

Children who are taught to manage their emotions have a greater ability to concentrate, do better in math and reading, are more disciplined, have a lower heart rate, and have fewer stress hormones in their bodies. nine0003

Four types of parents

There are four types of parents :

1. ignore the anger or discouragement of their children;
2. judge children for their feelings;
3. believe that the role of parents is limited to simply accepting their child's emotions;
4. help children make sense of their emotions and express them constructively.

For example, if a child sits with a sad expression on his face or cries, then the parents from the first group will simply not notice it. Parents from the second group will demand that the child be silent, stop crying, etc. Parents from the third category will try to calm or cheer up the child: they will sit in front of the TV and turn on the cartoon, give candy, pick it up, etc. Parents from the fourth group will ask:

- Are you sad?
- Yes.
- Did something happen?
- ...
- What will you do in this situation? How can you improve your mood? What conclusions did you draw from what happened? What has this story taught you?

Children of parents from the fourth category overtook their peers both in intellectual and physical development [1. With. 408].

Habit

The results of this study point to one of the most important areas of child upbringing. Parents can give children not only their love and control, but also teach them to be aware of their emotions and manage them. nine0003

In some countries teaching children to manage their emotions is a common element of parenting. William James more than a hundred years ago, in lectures to teachers, told how educated Hindus came to them in Cambridge.

“'I don't understand,' said one of them, 'how you can live the way you live: without devoting a single minute a day to thinking in a calm position. With us Hindus, a necessary part of our life is those at least half an hour a day that we spend in silence, in complete peace, holding our breath and contemplating eternity. Every Hindu child is taught this from a very early age.”… The good fruits of such a habit are manifested in physical calmness, in the absence of tension, in the amazing pleasantness and evenness of facial expression, in the equanimity of Hindus. And I felt that my compatriots themselves were depriving themselves of an important pleasant trait of character. nine0086