I learn how to get along
9 Tips On How To Get Along With People In Any Situation
No matter where you fall on the extrovert/introvert scale, wouldn’t it be great to learn better tactics to help you get along with the people you encounter in your daily life? Getting along with others is not complicated, but you do have to make a deliberate choice to practice and incorporate these tips into your daily interactions.
1. Listen with the intent to understand.
Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.
-Stephen R. Covey
If you make understanding another person a priority in any social circle, you will find that it is extremely easy to along with people. It is in the choice to invest time and emotional effort that the barriers to harmonious living are torn down. Planning or preparing yourself to understand others is a massive first step. You can do this by listening to what the person says (no planning your response while they are still talking!), making appropriate comments as they talk, and including references to their statements in your response.
2. Walk in their shoes.
Like coins, every social interaction has two sides. Sometimes, those lines between people can get blurred and cause misunderstandings. Taking the time to view the situation from someone else’s point of view will help you to get along better with them, even if you still do not agree with their views. As the quote says, you can’t understand (or get along with) someone until you have ‘walked a mile in their shoes.’ Get to walking!
3. Be polite.
Quite simple. Rude people do not get along with others. They may get along with other rude people, but those results have never been proven. Be careful of others’ feelings. Wit and humor at another person’s expense may do more damage than you will ever know. A polite demeanor will also leave a deeper positive impact than you will immediately realize.
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4.
Always take the opportunity to say a kind and encouraging word to or about somebody.
Praise good work, regardless of who did it. If criticism is needed, offer it gently, never harshly. If you recognize someone in need of encouraging, then that makes you the perfect person to do so! There are countless stories of people who have been inspired or motivated by a single needed word of encouragement at a critical time in their lives. When you encourage and compliment people, you create a culture of kindness and the kindness will be reciprocated.
5. Show interest in others.
Show interest in their pursuits, their work, their homes and families. Celebrate their achievements, grit your teeth with them through the rough times. Dance with people who are rejoicing and take time to weep with those who mourn. Let everyone you meet, however humble, feel that you regard him or her as a person of importance. If people around you sense that you support their best interest and also care about the ins and outs of their lives, you will get along with them just fine.
6. Keep an open mind.
Discuss, but don’t argue. It is the mark of a superior mind to be able to disagree without being disagreeable. Accept that others may have a point of view different from the one you hold, or believe something that you do not believe yourself. One sign of an open mind is someone who will listen to someone else speak, without interrupting, even if they disagree with the view being expressed. Differences make us human, idiosyncrasies make us unique and special!
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7. Listen intently.
This may not be anatomically true (I wasn’t a biology major), but the tongue and ears cannot both be used at the same time! Holding your tongue and freeing up your ears to listen actively for a bit gives you an easier path to an open mind and allows you to learn more about people around you. Other ways to listen intently include refraining from one-upping or pointing out problems with the speaker’s story.
8. Be positive.
No one enjoys spending time with a pessimist. Sir Winston Churchill said,
‘A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.’
Positive people are welcomed in any social situation because they continually brighten the room or space they occupy by seeing the silver linings in each cloud, and that optimistic attitude is contagious! This is one situation where two negatives do not a positive make. Positive people make positive situations.
9. Be sincere.
While each one of these tips is important, none stands alone. They all operate in some combination with one another, and none more than sincerity. People will sense when you are faking a positive attitude, when you do not have a genuine interest in their lives, and when your kind words are simply a facade. All of these tips without sincerity will end up destroying any positive effect you were hoping to produce.
Combined the tips above with a heavy dose of sincerity, you will find yourself getting along with people wherever you go!
Now this list is nowhere near exhaustive, so I’d love to hear what other tips you have heard or employed yourself! Feel free to share them below.
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10 Tips to Help You Make Friends and Get Along with Others
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February 2, 2021 - 15 min read
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Is it possible to get along with everyone?
Why is it important to get along with others?
Why do I have a hard time getting along with others?
How can I make friends more easily and get along better with others?
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Humans are social animals. This observation was first made by Aristotle more than 2000 years ago but continues to be a central truth about our existence. Cooperation with each other is at the heart of our lives and our societies.
At a fundamental level, we rely on each other for basic survival. For example, we rely on farmers to produce our food, and doctors to protect our health. But beyond survival, our reliance on each other helps us thrive. Social connection is a basic human need.
Having strong bonds with other people has a number of positive effects. It bolsters both our physical and emotional health, provides us with comfort in challenging times, and enriches our lives. When we can get along well with others, we are more comfortable and committed; we feel like we belong.
Building strong relationships seems to come naturally to some people, but can be more difficult for others, especially making friends as an adult. But interpersonal skills can be learned, and consciously working to improve them can have tremendous benefits on your well-being.
If you’d like to improve your skills in this area, here are some questions you might explore.
Is it possible to get along with everyone?
The short answer is mostly yes. Certain relationships can just be more inherently challenging than others. Perhaps you have different communication styles, have had conflict in the past, or just don’t see eye-to-eye. Perhaps you feel you have a fundamental difference in values. Any of these factors can make it more difficult to get along.
More difficult, but not impossible.
There may be times when you don’t get along with someone and have the flexibility to choose not to spend time with them. But there are also times we have to find ways to get along with family members, coworkers, neighbors, and other acquaintances because they are going to remain in our lives. In most cases, it is possible to improve these relationships and make them more positive.
Doing so will make your life easier. It might also reveal hidden value: a unique perspective, insight into sources of resistance, greater self-awareness and growth, and possibly a rewarding relationship.
Why is it important to get along with others?
The answer to this question lies in our understanding of how important relationships with others are to each of us. Because we are social animals, a significant part of our lives is based on interactions with others. This is true whether we are in school together, work on the same team, or simply live in the same neighborhood. Our ability to get along with others can help us succeed both personally and professionally.
There are individual differences in the number and types of relationships we seek out for our lives. Some prefer to surround ourselves with fewer people with whom we have deeper connections, while others seek to build a broad network of friends and acquaintances. Either way, it’s still important that we build these relationships and get along with others.
In our professional lives, having one or more friends at work has been shown to have tremendous benefits, to you and to your company. For instance, women with a best friend at work are more likely to have a positive experience during the day, including enjoying what they do and being recognized for success.
They are more engaged at work, so they are willing to go above and beyond in their roles, and may take greater risks that lead to innovation. Not to mention, when you spend more of your waking hours at work than you do at home, it’s nice to have a strong connection with someone who understands you personally and professionally.
Why do I have a hard time getting along with others?
The answer to this question can vary for each relationship, or each person. For example, you may not get along with a family member who has a different sense of humor from your own. You may feel resentment against a colleague who passed off one of your ideas as their own. Or you may have a hard time getting along with other parents at your child’s school because you have a different parenting philosophy.
Getting along with others in these cases can feel like compromising yourself. It can help to remember why you need to get along with them in the first place. Maybe you need to get along to make it through Thanksgiving dinner without upsetting your grandmother.
Maybe you need to work with a colleague to meet a client deadline. Maybe you need the participation of other parents to create a rich learning community for your children.
You don’t have to accept or even approve of all of the other person’s attitudes or behaviors. But sometimes we lose focus of what we have in common and forget the why of getting along in favor of all the why nots.
Look at each strained relationship individually to get to the root of why you might be having a hard time getting along with others.
- Look at your past. Take the time to reflect on relationships you’ve had in the past. This gives you an opportunity to learn from these relationships. What is your track record when it comes to getting along with others? Have you generally found most people easy to get along with, but occasionally meet people who you’d consider the exception to that rule? Or when you look across your life, do you see that there were a number of relationships that challenged you?
- Look for patterns.
When you connect the dots between various relationships, trends can emerge. Identifying those trends can be enlightening. Are there certain types of relationships or characteristics of individuals that you find most challenging? What is it about those relationships that challenges you? What are the similarities among the most difficult relationships in your life, and what can you learn from connecting these dots? - Look at yourself. As much as we want to look at others when we think about our relationships, it’s important to look at ourselves too. After all, you are the only common denominator across all of your relationships! Examining your own role in how you get along with others gives you an opportunity to identify your strengths and areas of opportunity when it comes to building relationships. When you think about people with whom you have gotten along, how did you show up in these relationships? When you think about people with whom you have not gotten along, how did you show up in these relationships? What can you learn from your own role in relationships with others? Are there things you do that tend to draw people close or push them away?
Understanding why you have a difficult time getting along with others can help you learn more about how to improve your relationships.
At the same time, after considering the roots of the strain, be realistic. Not every relationship will be a friend—more positive and productive is the goal.
How can I make friends more easily and get along better with others?
All relationships require work, though it may not always feel like work. That could mean a date night with your spouse, calling a friend, or getting together with your family for the holidays. Professional relationships require work too, whether that means inviting a new colleague to lunch or chatting about your personal lives with colleagues before a meeting.
Here are some tips to improve your relationships and get along better with others in both your personal and your professional lives:
- Listen to others. The most important skill in communication is the ability to listen to others. Rather than doing all the talking, take the time to stop and hear what others have to say. Refrain from interrupting or talking over other people.
- Be polite and positive. When you are the one speaking, do it in a way that considers others’ feelings and leaves a positive impact. Think about what you want to say before you say it, and don’t be afraid to apologize if you say something unintended. If you’re responding to someone, say something positive if you agree and offer an encouraging word. Doing this early in your relationship sets a healthy precedent for future interactions.
- Be honest and sincere. Another critical communication skill is to make sure you speak with honesty and sincerity. You will build relationships with others when you tell them the truth and they can trust the things you’re saying. When we trust people, we know that “they say what they mean, and they mean what they say.”
- Allow yourself to be vulnerable. People want to know who you truly are: the good and the bad. When you present yourself as perfect, people will doubt whether they’re getting to know the real you.
Displaying some vulnerability to others tells them that you are willing to open up to them and let them in. For example, share something you’re struggling with or a mistake you’ve made. - Show interest in others. Showing interest signals that you care to know them. Ask (and really listen to what they say) about their interests, experiences, and the things that are important to them. Building familiarity leads to greater comfort and trust. Reference these details in future interactions. For example, if you know your friend’s daughter recently started a new school, ask how she’s adjusting. Or if you know a colleague recently had a performance review, ask how it went.
- Keep an open mind. Listen with respect for other people’s perspectives and experiences. Look for opportunities to listen to them, even if you disagree with what they are saying. Be open to changing your mind or understanding things in a different way.
For instance, if your boss decides to move forward with another colleague’s project, rather than yours, take the time to learn more about that project. You may also want to ask for and receive feedback on your own project. A different perspective provides you with the opportunity to grow and learn. - Strive to understand. Tune in to what is important to other people and what they value. Ask questions that help you understand them more deeply. If you’re not sure why they said something or acted a particular way, ask them about it. For instance, if you have a colleague that leaves at 4:55 pm, when others may be staying late to finish a project, try to understand why. They may have a child that needs to be picked up from daycare or a parent that needs help to prepare dinner.
- Seek common ground. Look for the interests or experiences that you share. This should come naturally as you show interest in, and listen to, others.
You may find you listen to the same kind of music, both enjoy volunteering, or have similar professional goals. Use those common interests as the foundation of your relationship, and you are bound to find more over time.
- Repair small issues. Issues can arise in any relationship. Rather than allowing them to build, address issues while they’re small. This could mean apologizing or spending time talking about how you’ll both try harder in the future.
- Follow the Platinum Rule. As children, a lot of us learn the Golden Rule: treat others as you would want to be treated. But a higher standard to which we can hold ourselves is the Platinum Rule: treating others as they would want to be treated. When we get to know what’s important to other people and then treat them accordingly, we’re letting them know how much they mean to us and how important the relationship is.
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Final thoughts on getting along with others
We know that our relationships with others are important, but that doesn’t always make them easy to build or maintain. Exploring ways to get along with others can help facilitate these relationships and make them healthier and more positive. Making friends and getting along with others enriches our lives and enables us to thrive.
Published February 2, 2021
BetterUp Fellow Coach and PhD in Industrial/Organizational Psychology
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Meaning, Definition, Suggestions . What is getting along better
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Examples
The meaning of the word "GET ON"
To be in harmony, to live in harmony.
See all meanings of the word GET ON
Meaning of the word "BETTER"
Serves to strengthen persuasion, requests.
See all meanings of the word BETTER
Sentences with "get along better"
| Other results | |
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| Doctors provide better care when they continue to learn how to better support lactation and feeding. | |
| I thought it would be better to turn my garage into a laboratory. | |
| Vladyka would never find a better lackey than you. | |
| But it's hard to travel and paint, it's much better to go to one place and settle there and paint for a while in one place to better understand the landscape. | |
| We decided that climbing mountains is not worth it now, it's better to go swimming instead. | |
| The Cochrans got along better after Thanksgiving because of a family counselor visit. | |
| I didn't know if it would be better not to climb or to regain my normal posture in the Labyrinth. | |
| I think I'd better go to the lab. | |
| So... We better not screw up. | |
| the absence of Paasche indices in the price statistics, which are better suited for deflation than the available Laspeyres indices;. | |
| We spread the word that Lionel is better off luring you out. | |
| You know, before Lana has grown a few inches yet, and has not acquired a craving for warm blankets, you better tone it down. | |
| Would the world economy be better off today if US demand for $300 billion in industrial products from Europe, Asia, and Latin America just didn't show up? | |
| Okay, but you'd better take one of your energy drinks quickly, otherwise you, my friend, will not be able to withstand the shift. | |
| Okay, I better go get some biscuits or something. | |
| Most analyzes of the Latin American crisis say that all parties would have been much better served if they had agreed to partial debt forgiveness much sooner. | |
| For example, the US will be better able to assess the international security risks posed by Pakistani terrorist groups such as Lashkar-e-Toiba and Jaish-e-Mohammad. | |
| It would have been much better if Spain had not invaded Latin America. | |
| Well, at least these old people. Anything is better than nothing at all, thought Scarlett, measuring the lace and bashfully allowing herself to be patted on the chin. | |
| You and the little Hispanic that you sneezed out of your little cave you call womb better start looking for a new last name. | |
| Listen, paw, can you tell me which drill is better to drill a pine tree? | |
| Sorry I can't mess around, but Clarissa and I are checking out our new offices and I'd better switch, maybe have a latte on the way in my on-the-go-on-the-go mug. | |
| Okay, what if I also bet that my idea is better? | |
| Okay, well, I think I better warm up. | |
| With your permission, wouldn't it be better if I go to La G ranja, find out what happened there at night, and have someone follow and record the way you taught me? | |
| Okay, I'd better go down and have a look around. | |
| I was already beginning to think about what was better: to run after her or to hitch on the back of the landau, when suddenly a cab appeared on the street. | |
| This is better than anything we've done before, like a telescope or reflecting a laser pointer off the Taj Mahal. | |
| Lasagna is best eaten when it is cold. | |
This page provides the definition (meaning) of the phrase / expression "get along better", as well as synonyms, antonyms and sentences, if we have them in our database.
We strive to make the English-Grammar.Biz explanatory dictionary, including the interpretation of the phrase / expression "getting along better", as correct and informative as possible. If you have suggestions or comments about the correctness of the definition of "getting along better", please write to us in the "Feedback" section.
Get busy - make a doll!
Being a woman is becoming more and more difficult, and being a shoreline is almost impossible: there is a lot of work, little time, no happiness. You can, of course, wind up nerves for yourself and others, or you can try to wind dolls. Natalya Galiyeva from Sterlitamak knows how to get along — exactly how to get along, not how to sew! - Motanka fabric dolls (with emphasis on the first syllable). This is an unusual for us, but for centuries a proven way to be in silence, to hear ourselves, and then successfully negotiate with life and people about everything in the world.
Three generations and one joy
This story began the way the real thing usually begins - with science.
Dinara Gurbanova, a primary school teacher of the 15th school in Sterlitamak, was preparing her second-grader Elona Denisyuk for the city local history conference and the Russian Lomonosov Readings. Dinara and Elona chose the direction of "ethnography" and came to visit Natalia. In two hours, the craftswoman told them about the centuries-old folk craft and made three dolls. Elona, of course, won. But life is more interesting than science. How do representatives of different generations perceive the traditional doll - the embodiment of femininity?
— It is unusual to see a ritual doll for the first time: her face is not traced. But you take her in your hands, think about her character and feel that she is now like a friend to you, - Dinara shares her impressions. “I watch the craftswoman work, I see how in her hands a piece of fabric, a bunch of threads and an elegant scarf turn into the most necessary toys for a girl. At first glance, it seems that making them is easy and simple, I really want to try it too.
Playing with a folk doll, children reproduce life situations: receiving guests, a wedding, the birth of a baby. This introduces them to traditions, culture, goodness and beauty. This is how dolls lead the child to the big world.
And Elona received a doll with a baby as a gift, hugged her and immediately came up with a name for her - Alice.
Baba Yaga is better than Winx
Cheerful Fry Plantain fits in the palm of your hand. Cloud-like Insomnia saves children and adults from the disease of the same name. Yagusya, in a fervently tied scarf and with a broom, does not frighten anyone, but keeps the family. Ritual dolls, play dolls, amulets ... Natalya gets along with them the way our great-grandmothers got along - without scissors and needles. If the canvas of linen, cotton or satin cannot be torn by hand, the craftswoman prepares it - soaks it, softens it. And then it folds, twists - from unhurried movements an artistic image is obtained. Paradox: factory baby dolls with glazed eyes are cold, with a slight chemical smell.
Rag dolls without faces are warm. And unique as people:
— I did an experiment once: I divided a piece of cloth equally and began to wind the dolls — they turned out completely different! - Natalya's voice is soft and generous, like the sun's rays, under which flax grows. - When my daughter Aida was born, I made thread dolls for her. Aida is now 26, and I see that she and her peers respond with soul to this ancient folk art.
— But where does this responsiveness come from in you, a child of the Soviet era?
— I remember my grandmother and great-grandmother well. They lived in the village of Nikiforovo, and in the pre-war years they moved to the city. At the age of four, thanks to my grandmother, I learned to hold knitting needles in my hands. We, peers, toys were about the same, and my celluloid dolls were distinguished by bright knitted scarves. I remember my grandmother and I were on the train and she made me a handkerchief doll. Then at school, we, teenage girls, twisted dolls from bobbin threads.
- Who inspires you to get along with dolls today?
— Rag toys are natural and therefore short-lived. They are problematic to preserve for the next generations, so the skill is passed from mouth to mouth. The Internet helps: I watch master classes, communicate with Ryazan and Pskov masters. But for me, the main thing is that the doll is made according to the rules, I try to preserve the technology of making folk toys and read a lot of specialized scientific literature, for example, the works of the Belarusian ethnographer Zinaida Zimina (she preserves and studies folk costumes). I like to look at old photographs: I am interested in clothes that were worn before. I choose natural fabrics for dolls, pleasant to the touch, joyful shades. I have a doll that I don't even let anyone touch. Once I read a story about an ancient Akku doll: since ancient times, Karelians wore a charm on their bodies - a piece of birch bark (a tree is a symbol of life), and with the adoption of Christianity, this tradition began to be forgotten.
The old grandmother wrapped the birch bark in a doll and let the child play. Akka means grandmother.
- But the grandiose toy industry works for the modern child!
— Modern toys confuse me, to put it mildly. They lack a soul, they are stamped, of the same type - the children, fed up with them, do not appreciate them, do not cherish them, break them. We are all individual, and primitive toys average us. As a result, children grow up and follow the behavior model imposed on them, live in other people's dreams and lose themselves.
How the dolls of Natalya's relatives were found
- Once upon a time, dolls were placed in the cradle of an unborn child, wanting to protect him from evil forces. And where does the interest in folk toys come from in the age of information technology?
— When children make dolls, they develop fine motor skills, perseverance, curiosity, and the ability to work with different materials. And adults in our time of rapid change need to calm down and relieve stress.
Creativity helps a lot. Please note: even a mature woman, picking up a doll, brightens her face. Adults once made toys for almost every child, and this warmly warms us from childhood. The memory of past times is strong in our blood, the desire to create something with our own hands is strong. Only some people respect their desires, while others suppress them.
- You work as a process engineer at a factory. Do dolls help you take a break from work, or do you have to be rested to make them?
- To create dolls, you need a special mood: a bright head, no negativity in your thoughts. I have to be healthy and cheerful to have the right to do such important things. There is no TV in my workshop room. When I work, I sing something or have a mental dialogue with myself - I learn a lot about myself, deep memories awaken. It's like all the women of my kind sit next to me and do the same things that I do. By the way, dolls always come out differently than you think: each will turn out the way she wants, for example, in an unexpected color.
This is how our subconscious works, and it's quite fascinating. Sometimes I get up at 5 am and make dolls. I see how amazing each sunrise is, and I regret that not everyone sees it.
- Do you feel how your hobby affects your destiny?
— Thanks to dolls, I got to know my roots. The history of my family from my grandmother's side has been known to me since 1820, but I knew nothing about the origins of my grandfather's family. And recently, a relative who became interested in my dolls found me. It turned out that almost half of Transcaucasia are my relatives. I can guess why this happened: I am open to the world, ready to learn new things, to notice and reflect the good. Folk art taught me a lot: sometimes I get upset, but I don’t get upset anymore. I ask and I get answers. It turns out that it is realistic for any of us to achieve inner peace, not to blame ourselves for anything, not to be offended by people, to forgive everyone and live in peace with ourselves and others.
